Typical Hawken

Typical Hawken

Student 2 is sitting alone at a lunch table picks at his food. Student 1 walks up to the table and sits down
with his own lunch tray.

Student 1: Hey, why are you sitting all alone?

Student 2: I don’t know, everyone just kind of left me, you know?

Student 1: No, not really. Hey, what’s that on your plate?

Student 2: This? Oh, it’s a Slim Jim.

Student 1: Oh that’s cool.

The two sit quietly for a second.

Student 2: You want to know a secret?

Student 1: Sure.

Student 2: Well I’ve been thinking, really hard, you know?

Student 1: No, not really.

Student 2: Well you know how “slim” is just an adjective followed by “Jim”, the shortened name for
Jimmy?

Student 1: Okay…?

Student 2: And you know how “Dick” is the shortened name for Richard?

Student 1: Yeah…?

Student 2: Well, while I was eating my Slim Jim I was so disappointed by the fact that this thing is really
thin so I decided I’ll make a new product and call it the Thick Dick!

Student 1 leaves silently.