Thursday, April 2, 2009

Nothing

Guy 1: Hey, whatcha doing?

Guy 2 : Nothing.

Guy 1: Nothing?

Guy 2: Yeah, nothing.

Guy 1: How can you be doing nothing?

Guy 2: Like this…….. (he continues to stand idly and aloof)

Guy 1: You’re not doing nothing. You’re standing there.

Guy 2: Standing here (pause)……and doing nothing.

Guy 1: No you’re not.

Guy 2: Why not?

Guy 1: You can’t be doing nothing and standing there at the same time.

Guy 2: Yes I can.

Guy 1: The act of doing nothing and the act of standing cancel each other out. To

be standing and doing nothing at the same time would be impossible. (says in a rushed,

desperate manner)

Guy 2: It’s not impossible.

Guy 1: Prove it!

Guy 2: (Continues to stand idly and aloof)

Guy 1: Well?! I’m waiting.

Guy 2: Waiting for what?

Guy 1: For you to prove me wrong.

Guy 2: I am proving you wrong. (Continues to stand idly and aloof)


Guy 1: YOU’RE NOT DOING NOTHING!

Guy 2: Yes I am. (calmly)

Guy 1: No you’re not! You’re standing there, you’re breathing, you’re wearing shoes, and you’re talking to me!

Guy 2: And while I’m doing those things, I’m also doing nothing.

Guy 1: UGH!

A third person comes walking.

Guy 3: Hey guys, whatcha doing.

Guy 2: Nothing.
Guy 1 yells “UGH!” throws his hands in the air in frustration and storms off the stage


Guy 3: What’s his problem?

Guy 2: Don’t ask.

Fin.

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this blog is where we'll post play submissions for the 2009 two-minutes play contest as soon as we start receiving them. readers will read and rate the plays, and based on those ratings, we'll narrow down the submissions to a final group. each play must be read by at least three readers.