Humanities Randomness!!!

Main Character: And I, ROYAL SON OF BOB say to the crowd that stands before me on this holy night, ‘I shall not eat the tangerine of Buddha with awareness.’

Other people: (gasp) NO! How could this be?! We HAVE to follow the code! How could you royal son of BOB.

Main Character: ‘We don’t have to, we just want to… well not ME ANYMORE!!!!!! I shall be the first!!’

(roll a watermelon on stage which knocks over the royal son of bob)

Other people: (gasp) NO! How could this be?! It’s a CURSE, the curse of Confucius. How could you ROYAL SON OF BOB!!!!!

Main Character: Because I said SO.

(throw a apple at the body of the royal son of bob)

Other people: (gasp) NO! How could this be?! It’s a CURSE, the curse of Hermes, the giant killer!!!! He’s going to haunt ROYAL SON OF BOB!!!!

Main Character: OKAYYYYY. How do I get rid of these curses, THESE STUPID CURSES!

Other people: (gasp) NO! How could this be?! The only way to get rid of the curses is to recite the daoist text by Chuang Tzu.

Main Character: Alright… There is a beginning. There is a not yet beginning to be a beginning. There is not yet beginning to be a not yet beginning to be a beginning. There is being. There is nonbeing. There is a not yet beginning to be nonbeing. There is not yet beginning to be a not yet beginning to be nonbeing, Suddenly there is being and nonbeing. But between this being and nonbeing, I don’t really know which is being and which is nonbeing. Now I have just said something. But I don’t know whether what I have said has really said something or whether it hasn’t said something.

Wait a second… Is this supposed to make any sense!?!?!??

Other people: (gasp) NO! How could this be?! You must understand, royal son of BOB. Now you must die!

(throw thigh of bull of heaven at the royal son of bob)

(bob dies)

Other people: EVIL LAUGHTER!!! STUDY YOUR HUMANITIES!!!
Curtain